Friday, July 31, 2009

Friday Five: Why I love The World Wide Web

If I hadn't surfed on into April's blog a million years ago, I'd never have found her brilliant "Friday Five" slot. I need to holiday less and blog more. Here is my entry to an April classic call for blog comments...

I have lived:
1. The life of Riley
2. On three continents
3. By the skin of my teeth
4. In exile
5. Beside the sea
6. A life that’s full, and travelled each and every highway
7. In Belfast during the shoot to kill policy
8. In a house full with sunshine
9. Endless hours stuck in motorway traffic jams
10. To tell the tale

I have witnessed:
11. A car on fire on the hard shoulder
12. Persian Muslim women speaking sign language
13. Birth certificates
14. A NYC police woman control 8 lanes of traffic
15. A woman leap off a plane on the apron in a panic in high summer after 9.11. The aircon was broken, so we couldn’t take off and they opened up the doors. This was the cause of the delay, not the effect of her leap
16. Documents
17. A dead teenager at the side of the road, his motorbike beside him
18. Dawn in the Middle East
19. The closing ceremony of the Sydney Olympics
20. A perfect martini made for me in the Oak Room Bar at the Plaza Hotel

I have heard:
21. New York taxi horns at 3am… why?
22. The voices of firemen cutting me from a car
23. The bubbling of a cake as it comes out of the oven
24. Planet Rock at full volume
25. I do
26. The dawn chorus
27. The call to prayer
28. The Angelus in Rome
29. That your eyeballs pop out if you don’t close your eyes when you sneeze
30. If you unscrew your belly button your bum drops off

I have lost:
31. Faith
32. Hope
33. One new earring
34. My temper
35. My university 4x100m relay record to faster women
36. The ability to stay up all night
37. Patience with hypocrites
38. All sense of proportion when buying underwear
39. My taste for chardonnay
40. 41.

I have found:
41. French aluminium coins circa WW2 on a beach near St Malo
42. Lasting friendships online
43. That Nigella’s recipes don’t always work
44. That Delia’s always do
45. Lack of sleep makes me murderous
46. An entire though hollow lobster carcass on a beach
47. That Veronica Wallis’ (RUA) nudes make me cry
48. My best friend at our first meeting, which lasted five hours
49. There’s no such thing as a free lunch
50. The love of my life

I love:
51. Kevin Costner
52. Wearing heels
53. Coco Mademoiselle
54. Lots of detail
55. Certainty
56. Pablo Neruda’s love sonnets
57. Going to the cinema in the afternoon
58. A well-stocked pantry
59. Opening presents on Christmas morning
60. Sainsbury’s tea

I can:
61. Propagate by grafting
62. Follow intricate cross stitch patterns
63. Shuck oysters
64. Do handstands on the beach
65. Stamp about in work boots all day and still look sexy and professional
66. Laugh like a drain
67. Nurture teenagers brilliantly
68. Avoid urgent matters
69. Choose great wine and books by the label / cover alone
70. Discuss Derby County’s premiership campaign

I loathe:
71. Jellied eels
72. Washing poo from baby’s backs when they went up a size in nappies
73. The N word
74. James Woods. Sorry James
75. Missing Gardener’s World
76. People who eat with their mouths open
77. People spitting
78. Being nice to drunks
79. Cleaning the oven
80. Poorly drafted documents

I hope:
81. My gravestone says, “… here lies the beloved wife of Kevin Costner”
82. My passport arrives in time for my holiday
83. To see shooting stars this year
84. I don’t get caught speeding on the M1
85. To awake in Isla Negra, Chile
86. I don’t get my fingers burnt a second time
87. To be as knowledgeable as my head gardener
88. To have an outrageously sparkly ring from Tiffany’s
89. To become Miss Marple (Joan Hickson) on my 70th birthday
90. Therefore I am

I am trying:
91. To find time to get back on a horse
92. To eat more fruit
93. To eat less Marmite on toast
94. To believe, in the chasm of silence
95. To worry less
96. The patience of a saint
97. To read Dante’s Inferno
98. To be good enough to enter paradise
99. To be
100. To stop writing lists

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