Translate

Thursday, January 29, 2009

It Was Chinese New Year On Monday, Phantom

Finally. Three months of silence, in the middle of which Fiona lands me with a furious dilemma. Of course, April is really to blame for all this. Yes, April, you are to blame. If I hadn't started enabling comments, at your suggestion, I probably wouldn't have had Fiona awarding me a very lovely blog award last year. I haven't ignored it, Fiona. Quite the opposite, actually. Who the hell do I pass it on to?

I enjoy all the blogs I read, and all of them are invariably written by creative, vibrant, colourful individuals, even that strange, odd little blog that makes me laugh in a most unpleasant fashion at celebrities' misfortunes. There is however, one blog that really created a change in the way I live, and that's Phantom's blog. Well, not really his blog, really it's one of the blogs on his blog roll --> Eggs, bacon, chips and beans. Because until I checked out Phantom's blog roll, and found Russell Davies' great blog, I wouldn't have dreamed of entering a greasy spoon, certainly not actually eat in one. And now, whenever I'm in Nottingham early enough for brekkie, I call into the The Cosy Teapot, 101 Carrington Street, Nottingham, for a plate of eggs, bacon, chips and beans. The Cosy Teapot; the only place in the world where I have eaten chips for breakfast. Now that's creative blogging.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Still Too Cold To Garden

I bet Helen Yemm isn't standing in her kitchen drinking tea and staring out at her garden. At least it was dry and clear enough to get a line of laundry out. I'm thinking of renaming this blog "The Slacker Diaries."

Helen Yemm uses chicken wire to keep cats off seed beds... Amalee Issa uses a hundred pack of Sainsbury's bamboo barbeque skewers, inserted into the beds in random, overlapping directions, but always at an angle of 45 degrees.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

New Year, New Term, New President

I finally got my act together and put my hands into the soil over the weekend. Quickly drew them out again too, because it's still far too cold to be diddling about in the garden, and anyway, if I walk about on the lawns or the borders the soil would become compacted and rot off. It won't actually rot off, it'll just become compacted, airless and solid; I just rather liked the way rot off sounded as I wrote this. So far this winter we've had prolonged spells of freezing nights and fog-bound days. Sometimes the temperature doesn't rise above freezing from one weekend to the next, and the last thing the garden looks from the study is inviting. Throughout this enforced captivity both beloved firstborn and merci beaucoup enfant deux cope magnificently; taking to their beds 'til noon; making hot drinks; filling the dishwasher to bursting point almost daily; helpfully texting suggestions for that night's tea to be fetched on my way home... idle toe-rags.
The point at which the Riot Act was read came early in the New Year when I arrived home cold and fed up to a fridge bare of milk for a cup of tea. "Oh yes, I had the last of it on my breakfast cereal," ventured one recklessly brave undergraduate.

Punitive action inflicted, appropriately alarmed undergraduates subdued, dispersed and peaceably departed to their lawful business (their laundry, ironing and unloading the dishwasher), civil order was restored.
You can't read the Riot Act and expect the weather to take notice. You just have to accept the enforced exclusion from practical tasks and stand at the french windows, cup of tea in hand and day dream about the year ahead whilst finding delight in the present. The mixed deciduous hedge is the sparrows' playground, and invariably the point from which the wren emerges into the garden. I might need to lower it a bit this year, and if I can get it done before the end of February, I should be able to shape it without the hindrance of obscuring leaves. One of these days I'll make the time to take a hedge laying course. And a dry stone walling course. You can't live and work in our part of the rural English Midlands without passing a dry stone wall at some point in your day. Then there's the butchery course offered by some guy in ChesVegas. I could buy mercy boo that piglet she's been hankering for; call it "apple sauce"; non-permanent pet.
They are both back at uni now, and sent me texts from their halls where students gathered after their exams to watch the inauguration of Barack O'Bama, the first black Irish American President of the United States. Well done America, you voted in a good 'un.

Friday, January 09, 2009

Light Up, Light Up

Why am I the last person on the planet to hear the brilliance that is Leona Lewis? Because blasted Terry Wogan only started playing "Run" this week, during my morning drive to work, that's why. I love Wake-up to Wogan, described by Terry's producer as "food and filth." He's not wrong there. Terry starts drivelling on at 7.31am weekday mornings, half an hour into my journey down the M1, and finishes off two hours later long after I've arrived, parked up, and started on my second cup of tea of the day. Sometimes his Janet and John story is so outrageous I have to pull into the first lane to avoid a fast lane shunt because I'm laughing so much. Then there's the "poet laureate Andrew Motion" submitting his latest three line epic by email, or Barnsley Chop wooing the traffic totty with his unfinishable poems, usually starting something like this, "Oh lovely Lynne you have me in bits, I'd really like..." Chuffer Dandridge, the retired Shakespearean actooor manager invariably emails in with his latest attempt to relaunch a failed career. All interspersed with Terry chomping on snorkers and the latest provender sent in by enchanted listeners.
And each morning this week, driving through freezing fog and bitterly cold driving conditions, I've listened to Run. I looked up the lyrics tonight, and thought of you. So far from home, working in a war zone, having the shit bombed out of you. Sometimes it really is harder to be here not there, driving in and out to work and not knowing if you survived the night.